Chili’s Grill & Bar Almost Destroyed My Marriage.
Listen, Chili’s did apologize for the negative experience, but I’m too sad, dude. No coupon will ever pay for the next four months of therapy.
I ordered a burger to go for my husband. That’s it. That’s all. One burger. “Hi, I’d like a burger.” Is that a complicated order? I don’t think so.
After a 55 minute wait, I was given a large nylon bag with warm contents in it. I was in a hurry because it was 10pm and my husband was really hungry so I ran out of there and drove home. To my surprise, when I got home, the so-called burger was A PATTY in the middle of a large to-go box.
I stared at it for too long. My mouth couldn’t utter a word. I thought there might have been a mix up. Perhaps it was a prank. I called the place, still staring at the box.
My hungry husband rubbed his hands in front of his chest, walking toward me in a hoodie. I watched his semblance switch to horror as I told the person on the phone my predicament. The manager apologized. As I predicted, it was a mistake, I thought. Then, she went on to say I didn’t specify if I wanted the cheese or the bun.
WHAT KIND OF BULLSHIT IS THAT? I paid $13 for one dry ass patty.
Her response was so ridiculous, I wasn’t mad. I thought it was one of the most hilarious things that have ever happened to me.
My husband thought the opposite. Developing a unibrow, he toasted some bread and slapped a bunch of sauce on the dry beef patty. He abused the toaster and slammed the fridge door, realizing there was no cheddar cheese. Oh, pepper jack — thank God — but the last slice was growing mold. He grunted. I could feel his hate for our local Chili’s Grill & Bar growing.
In what world do you order a burger to then receive just one ingredient? It’s like ordering cake, and getting a bag of flour. Obviously, this manager had to be on Xanax or something. My husband stomped around the kitchen and shook his arms for comedic effect. I knew he was serious when he yanked a bag of frozen corn out of the fridge and started microwaving it because nothing indicates…